This is how it began:
In the middle of a kingdom, in a small cottage, lived Orphan. She had nothing to call her own; she had sold it all to buy acceptance. But when she looked at her acceptance, and then at the acceptance of others, she felt that it was not enough. Others got acceptance from friends, parents, and siblings, but not Orphan. All of Orphan's friends had moved away, her parents were busy, and her sister was too consumed with getting acceptance to ever give any away. Orphan had never felt so alone.
One day as Orphan went about her daily routine she noticed a Man following her. When their eyes met it looked like He would come over to talk to her, and that scared her, so she ran. Yet still, every day, He was there.
Finally she gathered her courage and went over to talk to Him. "Who are you? Why do you follow me?"
He replied, "I am the King. On the day you were born I saw you and was struck with your beauty. I have followed you every day hoping you would let me give you this gift." He held out His hands to her, and in them she saw acceptance in a greater measure than she had ever seen before. She also saw something else; she saw not only acceptance, but also love.
Surely this could not be a free gift, she thought. Hesitantly she asked, "What must I do to earn this?"
"Nothing. All I ask is that you receive it."
Orphan was not sure what to do, but because He was the King, she said yes. That night she lay in bed wondering if such acceptance really was hers. And such love!
Day after day, the King came back with more love and acceptance for her, and slowly Orphan began to fall in love. Finally, the King asked her to marry Him.
Orphan said yes. Her name was changed to Beloved, and never again did she feel the need to buy acceptance, for her Bridegroom always gave her everything she needed.
But as I said, that is how it began. To find out how it ends, turn and talk to the Man behind you. He's been following you for quite some time now...
Tuesday, December 17, 2013
Thursday, May 9, 2013
Psalm 1, NIV
Psalm 1
Blessed, highly favored, is the man who doesn't move in wickedness, linger in sin, or settle into a position of mocking God. Instead, this man finds delight in God's laws. (Interesting, isn't it, that not taking pleasure in what God requires of His followers eventually leads to mocking Him?) He meditates on God's laws constantly and is still delighted with them.
Meditating on God's laws is like putting down roots in it. Putting down roots in the soil of God's law (His word, the Bible) gives us a way to be sustained by Him. Just as natural plants pull in water through their roots, our knowledge of the Bible is a root through which the Living Water, Jesus, can flow into our hearts and sustain us.
When we are being sustained by the Living Water, we will yield our fruit in season. This is much simpler than it first seems. Just as an apple tree produces apples in apple season, we will produce patience in a season of waiting, joy in a season of trial, and so on.
Also as a product of drinking in the Living Water, our "leaf does not wither." Leaves are a sign of life. As long as our roots absorbing the Living Water, we will truly be alive.
When we are living out God's law, a method of allowing the Living Water to sustain us, everything we do prospers. We won't necessarily prosper on earth, but actions of obedience always increase heavenly prosperity.
The root system of a tree is its lifeline. But unbelievers don't have have the lifeline believers do. Therefore, they are like chaff. Because chaff has no roots, it has no life source and no way to anchor itself to anything. It is blown every which-way by the wind. In the same way, unbelievers are unstable and driven by the lusts of their flesh, because they are spiritually dead and have no anchor.
It takes a heart rooted in Christ to stand with the righteous in the judgement. Just as a tree with deep, solid roots stands more firmly than chaff when a hurricane comes, those of us who have grown a deep root system in God will stand more firmly than unbelievers in the day of God's wrath.
The LORD is protecting His trees. The chaff, however, will be burned in the lake of fire.*
*Matthew 3:12, Luke 3:17, Revelation 20:15
1 Blessed is the one
who does not walk in step with the wicked
or stand in the way that sinners take
or sit in the company of mockers,
2 but whose delight is in the law of the Lord,
and who meditates on his law day and night.
3 That person is like a tree planted by streams of water,
which yields its fruit in season
and whose leaf does not wither—
whatever they do prospers.
who does not walk in step with the wicked
or stand in the way that sinners take
or sit in the company of mockers,
2 but whose delight is in the law of the Lord,
and who meditates on his law day and night.
3 That person is like a tree planted by streams of water,
which yields its fruit in season
and whose leaf does not wither—
whatever they do prospers.
4 Not so the wicked!
They are like chaff
that the wind blows away.
5 Therefore the wicked will not stand in the judgment,
nor sinners in the assembly of the righteous.
They are like chaff
that the wind blows away.
5 Therefore the wicked will not stand in the judgment,
nor sinners in the assembly of the righteous.
6 For the Lord watches over the way of the righteous,
but the way of the wicked leads to destruction.
but the way of the wicked leads to destruction.
Blessed, highly favored, is the man who doesn't move in wickedness, linger in sin, or settle into a position of mocking God. Instead, this man finds delight in God's laws. (Interesting, isn't it, that not taking pleasure in what God requires of His followers eventually leads to mocking Him?) He meditates on God's laws constantly and is still delighted with them.
Meditating on God's laws is like putting down roots in it. Putting down roots in the soil of God's law (His word, the Bible) gives us a way to be sustained by Him. Just as natural plants pull in water through their roots, our knowledge of the Bible is a root through which the Living Water, Jesus, can flow into our hearts and sustain us.
When we are being sustained by the Living Water, we will yield our fruit in season. This is much simpler than it first seems. Just as an apple tree produces apples in apple season, we will produce patience in a season of waiting, joy in a season of trial, and so on.
Also as a product of drinking in the Living Water, our "leaf does not wither." Leaves are a sign of life. As long as our roots absorbing the Living Water, we will truly be alive.
When we are living out God's law, a method of allowing the Living Water to sustain us, everything we do prospers. We won't necessarily prosper on earth, but actions of obedience always increase heavenly prosperity.
The root system of a tree is its lifeline. But unbelievers don't have have the lifeline believers do. Therefore, they are like chaff. Because chaff has no roots, it has no life source and no way to anchor itself to anything. It is blown every which-way by the wind. In the same way, unbelievers are unstable and driven by the lusts of their flesh, because they are spiritually dead and have no anchor.
It takes a heart rooted in Christ to stand with the righteous in the judgement. Just as a tree with deep, solid roots stands more firmly than chaff when a hurricane comes, those of us who have grown a deep root system in God will stand more firmly than unbelievers in the day of God's wrath.
The LORD is protecting His trees. The chaff, however, will be burned in the lake of fire.*
*Matthew 3:12, Luke 3:17, Revelation 20:15
Monday, March 18, 2013
Another Journal Entry
Feb. 2, 2013
"He's a lot more interesting that us, but He never gets bored with you. He is fascinating beyond imagination, but we get bored with Him." - Mike Bickle
"Keep your silver and your gold, your riches untold, 'cause all I want, all I want is Jesus." - spontaneous worship
"You are the Vine and we are the branches...come prune these branches inside of me that steal from Your glory." - spontaneous worship
"I can speak Spanish and read the menu at Taco Bell at the same time!" - some random guy at FCF
Feb. 3, 2013
"My friends, my 'good Christian' friends back home are like, 'Dude, dial it down.' I'm like, 'Dude, I'm not even on yet." - random guy at GPR
My core group just spent about 15 minutes praying on the lifelines. Right at the end, as I kept repeating, "Fight for Your children," I got a mental "video" of a person holding a baby in one hand and a raised knife in the other. A sword was hacking at the knife and blocking it, but the person was still trying to kill the baby. Finally, Jesus snatched the baby away and held him close, then passed him on to a family that would love him. The person with a knife would get a new baby each time, but Jesus did the same thing with each one. May He do the same for each child facing abortion now and forever.
I've always loved Psalm 45:10-11, "Listen, O daughter, consider and give ear: forget your people and your father's house. The King is enthralled by your beauty; honor Him, for He is your Lord." But I've always focused on the first part of verse 11 and sort of skimmed the rest. The rest is what we're supposed to do.
It's saying, "Listen to this advice and consider it: forget the opinions of your family, your friends, and those you grew up with. Why? Because Jesus is enthralled (delighted to the point of distraction) with you. With you! He deserves your honor, 'cause He is your Lord."
Those two verses aren't just a compliment; they are an invitation. I, for one, am accepting.
Feb. 11, 2013
"All my favorite people are in the bathroom!" Oh, the random things I hear during prayer room bathroom breaks.
Oh, BTW, life is when your heart is trying to beat out through your chest to get to Jesus.
Feb. 12, 2013
I don't care what anyone else tells me. God is beautiful. He's so beautiful!
So...I'm going to be an equally-yoked bride. With Christ.
Okay, read that again. And again. And again, but think about it this time.
IS YOUR MIND BLOWN YET?!?!?
Seriously, equally yoked with Divinity? I will never fully grasp it this side of eternity.
"He's a lot more interesting that us, but He never gets bored with you. He is fascinating beyond imagination, but we get bored with Him." - Mike Bickle
"Keep your silver and your gold, your riches untold, 'cause all I want, all I want is Jesus." - spontaneous worship
"You are the Vine and we are the branches...come prune these branches inside of me that steal from Your glory." - spontaneous worship
"I can speak Spanish and read the menu at Taco Bell at the same time!" - some random guy at FCF
Feb. 3, 2013
"My friends, my 'good Christian' friends back home are like, 'Dude, dial it down.' I'm like, 'Dude, I'm not even on yet." - random guy at GPR
My core group just spent about 15 minutes praying on the lifelines. Right at the end, as I kept repeating, "Fight for Your children," I got a mental "video" of a person holding a baby in one hand and a raised knife in the other. A sword was hacking at the knife and blocking it, but the person was still trying to kill the baby. Finally, Jesus snatched the baby away and held him close, then passed him on to a family that would love him. The person with a knife would get a new baby each time, but Jesus did the same thing with each one. May He do the same for each child facing abortion now and forever.
I've always loved Psalm 45:10-11, "Listen, O daughter, consider and give ear: forget your people and your father's house. The King is enthralled by your beauty; honor Him, for He is your Lord." But I've always focused on the first part of verse 11 and sort of skimmed the rest. The rest is what we're supposed to do.
It's saying, "Listen to this advice and consider it: forget the opinions of your family, your friends, and those you grew up with. Why? Because Jesus is enthralled (delighted to the point of distraction) with you. With you! He deserves your honor, 'cause He is your Lord."
Those two verses aren't just a compliment; they are an invitation. I, for one, am accepting.
Feb. 11, 2013
"All my favorite people are in the bathroom!" Oh, the random things I hear during prayer room bathroom breaks.
Oh, BTW, life is when your heart is trying to beat out through your chest to get to Jesus.
Feb. 12, 2013
I don't care what anyone else tells me. God is beautiful. He's so beautiful!
So...I'm going to be an equally-yoked bride. With Christ.
Okay, read that again. And again. And again, but think about it this time.
IS YOUR MIND BLOWN YET?!?!?
Seriously, equally yoked with Divinity? I will never fully grasp it this side of eternity.
Sunday, March 17, 2013
Filler post
So, this is just a pathetic little filler post while I wait to remember to bring my journal for a real one. Consider this a promise of a better post to come sometime this week.
I'm now on spring break through the 21st, so I'll be catching up on rest and having some Jesus time. Not that I don't get Jesus time during this internship, I just don't get much quiet, one-on-one Jesus time. It's pretty much a choice between as much Jesus time as I want and as much sleep as I need. I've been compromising and not really getting either, but during break my time is my own. *happy dance*
Okay, I have to go. Rabbi is driving Lindsey to the airport, Maria is going so they don't break the no one-on-ones rule, and I'm going along so Maria and Rabbi don't break it on the ride back. Later, I promise!
I'm now on spring break through the 21st, so I'll be catching up on rest and having some Jesus time. Not that I don't get Jesus time during this internship, I just don't get much quiet, one-on-one Jesus time. It's pretty much a choice between as much Jesus time as I want and as much sleep as I need. I've been compromising and not really getting either, but during break my time is my own. *happy dance*
Okay, I have to go. Rabbi is driving Lindsey to the airport, Maria is going so they don't break the no one-on-ones rule, and I'm going along so Maria and Rabbi don't break it on the ride back. Later, I promise!
Thursday, March 7, 2013
Praise God
(Pardon the shouting. I had to emphasize this somehow, and I bet most people still won't really get this.)
The blood Jesus shed on the cross was the human blood of the incarnate Deity. Jesus died for me. That means that I am worth more to God than the life and blood of Deity incarnate. MY VALUE EXCEEDS THAT OF THE LIFE AND BLOOD OF DEITY INCARNATE.
Top that.
Top that? No problem.
Because I have entered by faith into a relationship with Deity through Deity incarnate, I have been given the fullness of God, Holy Spirit, to live inside of me. INSIDE OF ME. GOD. INSIDE OF ME. And that's just a down payment on my eternal inheritance. THE FULLNESS OF GOD DWELLING INSIDE OF ME IS ONLY A DOWN PAYMENT ON WHAT HE WILL ULTIMATELY GIVE ME.
With Holy Spirit inside of me, I have everything required to live in total perfection. But because of my broken flesh, I can't. However, because I have entered by faith into this relationship with perfect Divinity, the perfection of Deity incarnate has been given to me. God sees me as perfect. He sees me as equal to the Christ.
SERIOUSLY. I AM AS PERFECT IN GOD'S EYES AS JESUS IS.
But it gets even better.
Because God sees me as perfect (Song of Solomon 4:7, if you don't believe me), I will spend eternity in heaven with the Almighty Deity instead of in the pit of hell I deserve to be in right now. I am worthy and deserving of hell, but the blood of Deity incarnate has made me worthy and deserving of Himself. He doesn't just see me as worthy of Himself; He has actually made me worthy of Deity. GOD HAS MADE ME WORTHY OF HIMSELF. GOD HAS MADE ME WORTHY OF HIMSELF. GOD HAS MADE ME WORTHY OF HIMSELF.
Ain't no way to emphasize that enough, yo. And there's only one thing I can say to that:
Praise God.
The blood Jesus shed on the cross was the human blood of the incarnate Deity. Jesus died for me. That means that I am worth more to God than the life and blood of Deity incarnate. MY VALUE EXCEEDS THAT OF THE LIFE AND BLOOD OF DEITY INCARNATE.
Top that.
Top that? No problem.
Because I have entered by faith into a relationship with Deity through Deity incarnate, I have been given the fullness of God, Holy Spirit, to live inside of me. INSIDE OF ME. GOD. INSIDE OF ME. And that's just a down payment on my eternal inheritance. THE FULLNESS OF GOD DWELLING INSIDE OF ME IS ONLY A DOWN PAYMENT ON WHAT HE WILL ULTIMATELY GIVE ME.
With Holy Spirit inside of me, I have everything required to live in total perfection. But because of my broken flesh, I can't. However, because I have entered by faith into this relationship with perfect Divinity, the perfection of Deity incarnate has been given to me. God sees me as perfect. He sees me as equal to the Christ.
SERIOUSLY. I AM AS PERFECT IN GOD'S EYES AS JESUS IS.
But it gets even better.
Because God sees me as perfect (Song of Solomon 4:7, if you don't believe me), I will spend eternity in heaven with the Almighty Deity instead of in the pit of hell I deserve to be in right now. I am worthy and deserving of hell, but the blood of Deity incarnate has made me worthy and deserving of Himself. He doesn't just see me as worthy of Himself; He has actually made me worthy of Deity. GOD HAS MADE ME WORTHY OF HIMSELF. GOD HAS MADE ME WORTHY OF HIMSELF. GOD HAS MADE ME WORTHY OF HIMSELF.
Ain't no way to emphasize that enough, yo. And there's only one thing I can say to that:
Praise God.
Friday, February 15, 2013
Costumed Dodgeball Game
So, apparently it's an OTI tradition to have a costumed dodgeball game each internship. Everyone pooled a quarter each, and the winner of the contest got to have laundry money for the next month. (It's $2.50 for a full load of laundry, washer and dryer.) The winners were four girls who dressed up as the Cat in the Hat, Thing 1 and Thing 2, and the fish, whatever his name was. For their "presentation" on why they should win, Things 1 and 2 and the fish did a step clap thing back and forth and the cat, who is a girl from Russia, breakdanced. It totally rocked. And then my team won dodgeball, 4 to 1.
On our sixth game we ended early because Sam fell and hurt her knee. She's back home in Oklahoma now, visiting the doctor, and I heard she tore her ACL. If you would pray for her, I would really appreciate it.
So, for my costume, I went as a hipster version of Paul Bunyan. (If you don't know what a hipster is, google it; I don't have enough time to fully explain.) The best part by far was the shirt I designed for it; pretty good for 15 minutes if I do say so myself. Here's two pictures, one of my shirt and one of me in costume. (If you're wondering what the guitar was for, that's my ax. #boomtron)
PS: I went to IHOP Pancakes recently. Never go to the one in Grandveiw; it's so sketch.
On our sixth game we ended early because Sam fell and hurt her knee. She's back home in Oklahoma now, visiting the doctor, and I heard she tore her ACL. If you would pray for her, I would really appreciate it.
So, for my costume, I went as a hipster version of Paul Bunyan. (If you don't know what a hipster is, google it; I don't have enough time to fully explain.) The best part by far was the shirt I designed for it; pretty good for 15 minutes if I do say so myself. Here's two pictures, one of my shirt and one of me in costume. (If you're wondering what the guitar was for, that's my ax. #boomtron)
PS: I went to IHOP Pancakes recently. Never go to the one in Grandveiw; it's so sketch.
Sunday, February 3, 2013
Selections from My Journal Entries
(something that is in parenthesis in my journal)
[external note: something I've added later for clarification]
{selection removed from the middle of an entry for personal reasons}
underlined in my journal
This isn't everything from this time period; it's only what I chose to share.
Jan. 25, 2013
So, I've always thought Delirious?'s song "My Glorious" was, well, kinda awkward. Why call God, "my Glorious"?
Today in the IHOPU prayer room [external note: not the Global Prayer Room; IHOPU has their own on Fridays] the leader started singing, "You're my Glorious," and it clicked: God isn't just glorious, He's MY Glorious. Song of Solomon 2:16 "My Lover is mine and I am His" He's MY Glorious.
Jan. 26, 2013
Beautiful
I say you're beautiful
Beautiful
You are so beautiful
I'm overwhelmed
When I gaze into your eyes
I'm overwhelmed
'Cause I know that you are Mine
And you have no idea
What your love does to Me
So I will sing this song
Over you
You have ravished My heart
Beloved, My bride
You have ravished My heart
With one glance of your eyes
How delightful your love
Beloved, My bride
I long for your love more than
Finest of wine
In the same way I long to just look in your eyes
Won't you let Me come closer to look in your eyes?
Jan. 28, 2013
Earlier today, during one of my classes, Brandon Hammond [external note: he has this awesome quote, "The Bible's not boring, you're boring."] had us open with 10 minutes of praying in tongues. Those of us who don't, he said, should just say, "Jesus." He told us to focus on the Holy Spirit in us or on Jesus sitting at the right hand of the Father. So I closed my eyes, raised my hands, and proceeded to repeat "Jesus" however many times for the next 10 minutes.
You'll learn pretty quickly what your base emotion toward Jesus is if you repeat His name for 10 minutes while picturing Him. The more I said His name, the more longing and desperation crept into how I said it.
Not even half-way through, I saw Jesus lift me up into His lap. he sat cross-legged and I curled up there and clung to Him. We proceeded to have a conversation internally as I repeated His name externally.
{selection edited out}
I told Him I couldn't even cry over not feeling Him. When I finished, all Jesus said was, "I will teach you how to cry." He wouldn't explain or say anything else, no matter how much I asked.
Tonight, here in the prayer room, I cried over not feeling Him. There's a lot more in me, but it's a start. Jesus is teaching me how to cry.
Jan. 29, 2013
Yesterday, Jesus taught me how to cry. Today, He taught me joy.
Let me back up a bit. Last night, right before we went to bed, Bailee [external note: see previous posts for who Bailee is] said, "Tomorrow is going to be a good day." When I asked what was happening tomorrow, she said that she didn't know, but she had a feeling it would be really good.
Today (Tuesday) we had our first Burn class with Cory Russell. Someone asked me what Burn class is, and I said (from my memory of 2011) that it was where the Holy Spirit comes down and makes everyone go crazy. A slightly more accurate description is where the Holy Spirit floods the room and lights everyone on fire. (Yes, we can feel the burn.)
Today, besides burning us all, Holy Spirit released a fair taste of joy amongst us. Prophetess Bailee then made a comment at dinner that there would be a lot of joy in the prayer room tonight.
Right now, I'm having a hard time breathing. (Partly because I'm out of water and I don't want to leave the room to get more.) I always dance when I worship; no matter where we are, if I have room, I dance at least a little. But this time I was joined as most of the GPR [external note: Global Prayer Room] was flooding the isles with people dancing for joy. That went on for 1 1/2 to 2 hours. (I wasn't exactly checking my watch; I was dancing and trying to breathe.)
So I think that I'll sleep well tonight. That was fun. I hope we close with more of the same.
If you don't think solo acoustic guitar can carry energy, you should have seen the start of Ryan Kondo's set. (Yeah, that lasted through a leader switch.)
And you ain't seen the joy of God moving until you've seen the nations dancing together in praise.
Jan. 30, 2013
Well, I enjoyed the end of yesterday's prayer room. The whole room wasn't quite as effusive, though.
It's afternoon prayer room today. The leader, in the last song of the 2-4 set, sang, "Send Your glory, Lord, send it on down." When he started singing that, I immediately felt a little breeze hit my face (it's still going, actually, and I don't see any air vents where it's coming from). I thought something along the lines of, "Oh, how cute, a little sign of His presence." (Exaggerated, but similar.) I didn't hear a word, but I got the feeling that was way the wrong way attitude to have. It's got me thinking about what Aunty Betty told me about there not being such a thing as a little miracle; the very fact God loves us enough to do the miracle is astounding. The fact that Almighty God reveals His presence to humanity, even through a little breeze, is astonishing. At least, it should be.
"Your love alone will dethrone the dark and make known Your Son to come and light the spark to reignite the heart to stand tall and shout 'til every man knows Messiah."
- spontaneous rap chorus during prayer room
"He's a lot more interesting that us, but He never gets bored with you. He is fascinating beyond imagination, but we get bored with Him."
- Mike Bickle, Feb. 2, 2013 FCF Saturday service
Spontaneous lyrics durning FCF Feb. 2
"Keep your silver and your gold, your riches untold, 'cause all I want is Jesus."
"You are the vine and we are the branches; You are the Father of second chances. Come prune those branches inside of me that steal from Your glory."
[external note: something I've added later for clarification]
{selection removed from the middle of an entry for personal reasons}
underlined in my journal
This isn't everything from this time period; it's only what I chose to share.
Jan. 25, 2013
So, I've always thought Delirious?'s song "My Glorious" was, well, kinda awkward. Why call God, "my Glorious"?
Today in the IHOPU prayer room [external note: not the Global Prayer Room; IHOPU has their own on Fridays] the leader started singing, "You're my Glorious," and it clicked: God isn't just glorious, He's MY Glorious. Song of Solomon 2:16 "My Lover is mine and I am His" He's MY Glorious.
Jan. 26, 2013
Beautiful
I say you're beautiful
Beautiful
You are so beautiful
I'm overwhelmed
When I gaze into your eyes
I'm overwhelmed
'Cause I know that you are Mine
And you have no idea
What your love does to Me
So I will sing this song
Over you
You have ravished My heart
Beloved, My bride
You have ravished My heart
With one glance of your eyes
How delightful your love
Beloved, My bride
I long for your love more than
Finest of wine
In the same way I long to just look in your eyes
Won't you let Me come closer to look in your eyes?
Jan. 28, 2013
Earlier today, during one of my classes, Brandon Hammond [external note: he has this awesome quote, "The Bible's not boring, you're boring."] had us open with 10 minutes of praying in tongues. Those of us who don't, he said, should just say, "Jesus." He told us to focus on the Holy Spirit in us or on Jesus sitting at the right hand of the Father. So I closed my eyes, raised my hands, and proceeded to repeat "Jesus" however many times for the next 10 minutes.
You'll learn pretty quickly what your base emotion toward Jesus is if you repeat His name for 10 minutes while picturing Him. The more I said His name, the more longing and desperation crept into how I said it.
Not even half-way through, I saw Jesus lift me up into His lap. he sat cross-legged and I curled up there and clung to Him. We proceeded to have a conversation internally as I repeated His name externally.
{selection edited out}
I told Him I couldn't even cry over not feeling Him. When I finished, all Jesus said was, "I will teach you how to cry." He wouldn't explain or say anything else, no matter how much I asked.
Tonight, here in the prayer room, I cried over not feeling Him. There's a lot more in me, but it's a start. Jesus is teaching me how to cry.
Jan. 29, 2013
Yesterday, Jesus taught me how to cry. Today, He taught me joy.
Let me back up a bit. Last night, right before we went to bed, Bailee [external note: see previous posts for who Bailee is] said, "Tomorrow is going to be a good day." When I asked what was happening tomorrow, she said that she didn't know, but she had a feeling it would be really good.
Today (Tuesday) we had our first Burn class with Cory Russell. Someone asked me what Burn class is, and I said (from my memory of 2011) that it was where the Holy Spirit comes down and makes everyone go crazy. A slightly more accurate description is where the Holy Spirit floods the room and lights everyone on fire. (Yes, we can feel the burn.)
Today, besides burning us all, Holy Spirit released a fair taste of joy amongst us. Prophetess Bailee then made a comment at dinner that there would be a lot of joy in the prayer room tonight.
Right now, I'm having a hard time breathing. (Partly because I'm out of water and I don't want to leave the room to get more.) I always dance when I worship; no matter where we are, if I have room, I dance at least a little. But this time I was joined as most of the GPR [external note: Global Prayer Room] was flooding the isles with people dancing for joy. That went on for 1 1/2 to 2 hours. (I wasn't exactly checking my watch; I was dancing and trying to breathe.)
So I think that I'll sleep well tonight. That was fun. I hope we close with more of the same.
If you don't think solo acoustic guitar can carry energy, you should have seen the start of Ryan Kondo's set. (Yeah, that lasted through a leader switch.)
And you ain't seen the joy of God moving until you've seen the nations dancing together in praise.
Jan. 30, 2013
Well, I enjoyed the end of yesterday's prayer room. The whole room wasn't quite as effusive, though.
It's afternoon prayer room today. The leader, in the last song of the 2-4 set, sang, "Send Your glory, Lord, send it on down." When he started singing that, I immediately felt a little breeze hit my face (it's still going, actually, and I don't see any air vents where it's coming from). I thought something along the lines of, "Oh, how cute, a little sign of His presence." (Exaggerated, but similar.) I didn't hear a word, but I got the feeling that was way the wrong way attitude to have. It's got me thinking about what Aunty Betty told me about there not being such a thing as a little miracle; the very fact God loves us enough to do the miracle is astounding. The fact that Almighty God reveals His presence to humanity, even through a little breeze, is astonishing. At least, it should be.
"Your love alone will dethrone the dark and make known Your Son to come and light the spark to reignite the heart to stand tall and shout 'til every man knows Messiah."
- spontaneous rap chorus during prayer room
"He's a lot more interesting that us, but He never gets bored with you. He is fascinating beyond imagination, but we get bored with Him."
- Mike Bickle, Feb. 2, 2013 FCF Saturday service
Spontaneous lyrics durning FCF Feb. 2
"Keep your silver and your gold, your riches untold, 'cause all I want is Jesus."
"You are the vine and we are the branches; You are the Father of second chances. Come prune those branches inside of me that steal from Your glory."
Monday, January 28, 2013
Photos
Okay, so these are croppings of the best photos I have of everyone, so you can meet them. :)
My core group! (left to right) Front: Maria, Bailee, and Jenny. Back: Sharon, Sam, Lindsey, Estefania, and Meredith.
And in this one, I just tagged people:
One more; this is something that happens often:
This is my outside-the-prayer-room normal. Have fun thinking about that.
And in this one, I just tagged people:
One more; this is something that happens often:
Thursday, January 24, 2013
A few of my new friends
So, I thought I'd do a brief introduction to a few of my new friends, just so I can use names later without you all going, "Huh?"
Roommate:
Bailee is my roommate. She's the only one I have, but our ACL (Assistant Core Leader) is in the same apartment. She is the awesomest roomie ever! We get along really well. She's really funny, and if I don't survive OTI, it's because she made me die laughing.
Core Leader
Sharon is our CL. She's a lot of fun just to be around. I can't figure out who she reminds me of, but when I figure it out, you'll probably find out.
ACL:
Sam is our ACL. She lives in the same apartment as Bailee and me, but she's in a different room. Between her IHOPU classes and our OTI classes, we just about only see her at our core group meetings and house meetings (where our core group gets together in our apartment; our core group has two apartments, mine and the one across the hall).
Core group (#8):
The other girls in my core group are Meredith, Lindsey, Maria, Estefania, and Jenny. (There were two others who were supposed to be in with Bailee and me, but they didn't show up.) Meredith is by far the most enthusiastic of all of us. She really has a passion for God and a desire to grow. Lindsey has the most infectious smile I've ever seen. She's also adorable. Maria is probably the toughest. She's part Filipino and ran track in high school. Estefania and Jenny are international. Jenny is from England but she's originally German; I don't remember what country Estefania is from, but she's Latin American. I should probably also note that we're all 18 because they group us by age, and I'm the oldest.
Others I've hung out with:
Okay, first I should note that the girls all tend to clump together with their core groups, so it's really hard to meet new girls. That said, I am starting to get to know one, named Pamela, but I don't know her well yet. The guys are far more open to meeting new people, and Bailee, Maria, and I are all working on "breaking the wall" between guys and girls (aka, we're getting to know quite a few of the guys and trying to pull other girls into the mixed tables). The guys we've hung out with most are Gabe, Luke, and two Joshes (no idea if I pluralized that correctly or not). We call Gabe "Rabbi" because he has an awesome long, untrimmed beard. He just turned 25 yesterday. Luke is really hyper. If Bailee doesn't kill me, Luke will. The first Josh is really talkative and into psychology. The second is just sort of...there. He's really quiet. I've also had a few conversations with a guy named Peter. He gave me an Anthem Lights CD, so yeah, he's awesome.
And that's about it so far. I'll write about more people as I get to know them.
Bye everyone!
PS. Oh, and the family I stayed with my first night here, their son is one of the worship leaders. So it's kinda cool to be walking down the sidewalk and stop for a conversation with a worship leader.
Roommate:
Bailee is my roommate. She's the only one I have, but our ACL (Assistant Core Leader) is in the same apartment. She is the awesomest roomie ever! We get along really well. She's really funny, and if I don't survive OTI, it's because she made me die laughing.
Core Leader
Sharon is our CL. She's a lot of fun just to be around. I can't figure out who she reminds me of, but when I figure it out, you'll probably find out.
ACL:
Sam is our ACL. She lives in the same apartment as Bailee and me, but she's in a different room. Between her IHOPU classes and our OTI classes, we just about only see her at our core group meetings and house meetings (where our core group gets together in our apartment; our core group has two apartments, mine and the one across the hall).
Core group (#8):
The other girls in my core group are Meredith, Lindsey, Maria, Estefania, and Jenny. (There were two others who were supposed to be in with Bailee and me, but they didn't show up.) Meredith is by far the most enthusiastic of all of us. She really has a passion for God and a desire to grow. Lindsey has the most infectious smile I've ever seen. She's also adorable. Maria is probably the toughest. She's part Filipino and ran track in high school. Estefania and Jenny are international. Jenny is from England but she's originally German; I don't remember what country Estefania is from, but she's Latin American. I should probably also note that we're all 18 because they group us by age, and I'm the oldest.
Others I've hung out with:
Okay, first I should note that the girls all tend to clump together with their core groups, so it's really hard to meet new girls. That said, I am starting to get to know one, named Pamela, but I don't know her well yet. The guys are far more open to meeting new people, and Bailee, Maria, and I are all working on "breaking the wall" between guys and girls (aka, we're getting to know quite a few of the guys and trying to pull other girls into the mixed tables). The guys we've hung out with most are Gabe, Luke, and two Joshes (no idea if I pluralized that correctly or not). We call Gabe "Rabbi" because he has an awesome long, untrimmed beard. He just turned 25 yesterday. Luke is really hyper. If Bailee doesn't kill me, Luke will. The first Josh is really talkative and into psychology. The second is just sort of...there. He's really quiet. I've also had a few conversations with a guy named Peter. He gave me an Anthem Lights CD, so yeah, he's awesome.
And that's about it so far. I'll write about more people as I get to know them.
Bye everyone!
PS. Oh, and the family I stayed with my first night here, their son is one of the worship leaders. So it's kinda cool to be walking down the sidewalk and stop for a conversation with a worship leader.
PSS. And yes, I am starting to get a southern accent all ready.
Saturday, January 19, 2013
Friday Night EGS (Encountering God Service)
Wow.
That is the first thing that comes to mind when I think of last night's EGS. I did not get to stay for the whole thing (OTI's, or One Thing Interns, had to leave two hours early that night only), but it was incredible.
We opened with worship; I am not sure for how long, because I did not exactly spend much time looking at my watch. At the end of the first worship set (music kept playing the whole time, though) the first ministry time began. People who needed prayer for discouragement and people who wanted prayers for physical healing were asked to raise their hands so others could pray with them. I raised my hand because my back was really hurting.
I have had a couple of spots in my back for a long time. One was in my lower back, where I had a disc that was worn thin. Being too thin meant that every time it got shifted out of place, a nerve got pinched and sent pain up and down my back whenever I tried to move. I also had a spot between my shoulder blades that I hurt when I was about twelve.
Three girls came over to pray for me. As soon as they started praying, the pain in between my shoulders disappeared (and believe me, I noticed). Then I felt a pressure in my lower back, and when it went away, my muscles started getting sore and my spine felt stretched. I could feel the full disc in my back.
Yes, you read that correctly. I COULD FEEL THE FULL DISC IN MY BACK!
So one of the girls told me I should go tell my testimony to the people collecting them. The lady I spoke to asked me to tell what happened on stage, and after I shared my testimony, the man on stage (no idea if he is a pastor or not) asked everyone with a back injury to stand so we could pray for healing. When all this was done, I went back to my seat.
Less than a minute after I got to my seat, an elderly lady with the Simeon Company (an IHOP internship for people 50 and older) came up to me and told me her friend said I should pray for her. I asked her what was wrong, and she explained that she had scoliosis and something in her lower back that made her legs tingle. I prayed for her for about 45 seconds, then asked how she felt. She said she still hurt, but the pain had changed. I explained that if the pain had changed, that meant her back had straightened, but her body was not used to it being straight. I told her she would probably be sore for a few more days while her muscles got used to how they are supposed to be, and then she would feel fine. (For those who do not remember, I was healed of scoliosis on my mission trip to Ecuador; that is how I know about all of this.) She was filled with joy. As she thanked me, she was practically glowing.
And that was less than half of the night.
It is impossible to explain everything that happens in an EGS to someone who has never been there. Honestly, I think coming to IHOP would be worth it for anyone just for EGS, but then, I also haven't started my prayer room hours yet; those start tomorrow. IHOP webstreams their EGS services, so if you can, you might want to try to stream it some time. (Yes, I know internet in Dutch is horrible.) You can find it through ihopkc.org. It might be on the same webstream that the Global Prayer Room (GPR; I have so many abbreviations to learn) is normally streamed.
God bless you all as He continues to do for me. 'Til next time.
That is the first thing that comes to mind when I think of last night's EGS. I did not get to stay for the whole thing (OTI's, or One Thing Interns, had to leave two hours early that night only), but it was incredible.
We opened with worship; I am not sure for how long, because I did not exactly spend much time looking at my watch. At the end of the first worship set (music kept playing the whole time, though) the first ministry time began. People who needed prayer for discouragement and people who wanted prayers for physical healing were asked to raise their hands so others could pray with them. I raised my hand because my back was really hurting.
I have had a couple of spots in my back for a long time. One was in my lower back, where I had a disc that was worn thin. Being too thin meant that every time it got shifted out of place, a nerve got pinched and sent pain up and down my back whenever I tried to move. I also had a spot between my shoulder blades that I hurt when I was about twelve.
Three girls came over to pray for me. As soon as they started praying, the pain in between my shoulders disappeared (and believe me, I noticed). Then I felt a pressure in my lower back, and when it went away, my muscles started getting sore and my spine felt stretched. I could feel the full disc in my back.
Yes, you read that correctly. I COULD FEEL THE FULL DISC IN MY BACK!
So one of the girls told me I should go tell my testimony to the people collecting them. The lady I spoke to asked me to tell what happened on stage, and after I shared my testimony, the man on stage (no idea if he is a pastor or not) asked everyone with a back injury to stand so we could pray for healing. When all this was done, I went back to my seat.
Less than a minute after I got to my seat, an elderly lady with the Simeon Company (an IHOP internship for people 50 and older) came up to me and told me her friend said I should pray for her. I asked her what was wrong, and she explained that she had scoliosis and something in her lower back that made her legs tingle. I prayed for her for about 45 seconds, then asked how she felt. She said she still hurt, but the pain had changed. I explained that if the pain had changed, that meant her back had straightened, but her body was not used to it being straight. I told her she would probably be sore for a few more days while her muscles got used to how they are supposed to be, and then she would feel fine. (For those who do not remember, I was healed of scoliosis on my mission trip to Ecuador; that is how I know about all of this.) She was filled with joy. As she thanked me, she was practically glowing.
And that was less than half of the night.
It is impossible to explain everything that happens in an EGS to someone who has never been there. Honestly, I think coming to IHOP would be worth it for anyone just for EGS, but then, I also haven't started my prayer room hours yet; those start tomorrow. IHOP webstreams their EGS services, so if you can, you might want to try to stream it some time. (Yes, I know internet in Dutch is horrible.) You can find it through ihopkc.org. It might be on the same webstream that the Global Prayer Room (GPR; I have so many abbreviations to learn) is normally streamed.
God bless you all as He continues to do for me. 'Til next time.
Tuesday, January 15, 2013
Tomorrow is happening because of...
Tomorrow.
That is when I fly down to Kansas City.
I wanted to post before leaving because I do not know when I will be able to post again. I hope to get internet every Thursday, or at least every other Thursday, but that will depend on transportation and all that good stuff.
So on the eve of my life changing radically (other than the emotional havoc leaving my family is causing), I wanted to take a few minutes to just say thank you to a few of the people who have really shaped me during my childhood. I wish I could get everyone; some of you would no doubt be surprised how much you have impacted me. For the sake of actually getting to bed tonight, and not drowning my laptop, I can only thank a few individually.
Dad - you have always been my hero. As a little girl, I could always be Cinderella because you showed me there are princes in the world. I love you.
Mom - you always held me when I cried. Because of you, I always knew that whether or not anyone really understood, someone wanted to because you love me. I love you so much.
Cassie - my beautiful little sister and my best friend. I am so blessed to have you as my sister. I will miss our crazy conversations in person, but look forward to having them through email and on the phone. I love you, little sis.
Beth Whitaker - my beautiful inspiration. You are a wonderful role model and friend. Thank you for the privilege of working with you and the blessing of being your friend.
Sue Honan - you opened for me a world of music I never guessed would become my passion. I had no idea when you started teaching me guitar that it would be my calling. Thank you so much for the blessing you gave me when you said yes to those lessons.
Marita Kirchhofer - I have been inspired many times by your patience with the kids and your wonder at God's creation. I have prayed many times for God to give me both of those after spending time with you. Thank you for being such a good friend.
Julie Herrmann (and you have no idea how much I love using your new last name!) - we are so different, yet we managed to always be close. So much has changed for both of us, but I will always treasure our relationship. God bless you.
Ariel Gustafson-Shapsnikoff - you came into my life later than everyone else on this list, but somehow you have made more impact for the time I have known you than anyone other than family. Whenever the devil tells you that you are a bad role model, poke him in the eye. ;) You have a beautiful heart for God and a passion to become more like Him. Any kid that catches that from you will change the world like you have done and will no doubt keep doing. God bless you, and rock on!
Ali Murray - you scare me in a good way. :P Never forget how beautiful you are or how much I love you. Friends till friendship no longer exists!
Well, I cried a lot more during that than I expected. And now I need to go to bed. Big day tomorrow!
Goodbye, old life.
Kansas City, ready or not, here I come.
PS. Before they get mad at me for not including them, thank you to my honorary little brothers, Ethan Mahoney and Jacob Miller, for making everything funny. You guys are awesome. :)
Sunday, January 6, 2013
Just to catch you up...
So, what I've been up to lately...
I have not actually blogged about this for a couple of weeks, so I am not going all the way back.
On Wednesday, I got up around 2 a.m. so I could say goodbye to my daddy. He flew out of Anchorage around 6 a.m. Then Mom and I drove back in and slept for a little longer. After getting up, I finished packing and played guitar for about half an hour with Cassie playing percussion. (The Empty Water Bottle: the ultimate percussion "instrument"!) Our plane flew out around 6 p.m.
Thursday morning I went to the emergency room of on of the many hospitals in Seattle. (Emergency room because I did not have an appointment.) After getting checked out, I had some medication prescribed and am now feeling much better. Thank you to everyone who prayed.
Friday was a hang out in Seattle and see how much better I would feel day. I improved enough that yesterday, Saturday, we (now referring to Mom, Cassie, and I) drove out to Neah Bay. We visited my grandma for a few minutes, then continued on to where we are staying and kinda crashed.
So now it is Sunday, and I am up and alert earlier than I have been in a long time. The bed is really comfy memory foam, and I slept pretty well. Now I need to go get ready for "home church." Later people!
I have not actually blogged about this for a couple of weeks, so I am not going all the way back.
On Wednesday, I got up around 2 a.m. so I could say goodbye to my daddy. He flew out of Anchorage around 6 a.m. Then Mom and I drove back in and slept for a little longer. After getting up, I finished packing and played guitar for about half an hour with Cassie playing percussion. (The Empty Water Bottle: the ultimate percussion "instrument"!) Our plane flew out around 6 p.m.
Thursday morning I went to the emergency room of on of the many hospitals in Seattle. (Emergency room because I did not have an appointment.) After getting checked out, I had some medication prescribed and am now feeling much better. Thank you to everyone who prayed.
Friday was a hang out in Seattle and see how much better I would feel day. I improved enough that yesterday, Saturday, we (now referring to Mom, Cassie, and I) drove out to Neah Bay. We visited my grandma for a few minutes, then continued on to where we are staying and kinda crashed.
So now it is Sunday, and I am up and alert earlier than I have been in a long time. The bed is really comfy memory foam, and I slept pretty well. Now I need to go get ready for "home church." Later people!
Saturday, January 5, 2013
Remember This Always
2 Kings 6:8-17
Now the king of Aram was at war with Israel. After
conferring with his officers, he said, “I will set up my camp in such and such
a place.”
The man of God sent word to
the king of
Israel: “Beware of passing that place, because the Arameans are going down
there.” So the king of Israel
checked on the place indicated by the man of God. Time and again Elisha warned the king, so that he was on his guard in
such places.
This enraged the king of
Aram. He summoned his officers and demanded of them, “Will you not tell me
which of us is on the side of the king of Israel?”
“None of us, my lord the
king,” said one of his officers, “but Elisha, the prophet who is in Israel,
tells the king of Israel the very words you speak in your bedroom.”
“Go, find out where he
is,” the king ordered, “so I can send men and capture him.” The report came
back: “He is in Dothan.” Then he senthorses and
chariots and a strong force there. They went by night and surrounded the city.
When the servant of the
man of God got up and went out early the next morning, an army with horses and
chariots had surrounded the city. “Oh, my lord, what shall we do?” the servant
asked.
“Don’t be afraid,” the prophet answered. “Those who are with
us are more than those who are with them.”
And Elisha prayed, “O Lord, open his eyes so he may see.” Then the Lord opened the servant’s eyes, and he looked
and saw the hills full of horses and chariots of fire all around Elisha.
Chris Tomlin - Whom Shall I Fear
"I know Who goes before me, I know Who stands behind: the God of angel armies is always on my side. The One who reigns forever, He is a Friend of mine. The God of angel armies is always by my side."
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