Wedding

     The church was beautiful.  The arch at the front was covered in purple crepe paper, white tulle, and synthetic ivy vines.  The lighting was low, accenting the soft green of the stage and minimizing the burgundy chairs in which the guests were seated.  The bridesmaids, the maid of honor, the bouquets - all of them were lovely.
     But loveliest of all was the bride.  In a sleeveless, lace-topped gown with pleated gathers at the waist, her hair done in curls twisted to the side and pinned with rhinestone clips, she was stunning.  Her smile as she joined her groom was brilliant and full of joy.
     And she is my best friend.
     We grew up together.  She is just over a year older than me.  And she is married.
     No matter how happy I am for her, the fact that she's married is surreal, not because I have known her for so long, but because she met her husband when she was a few months older than I am now.
     Now, I know some people would take this opportunity to tease me.  "It's coming soon!"  "So, when are you getting married?"  "You'll be dating in no time."  Guess what, people?  That is the most frustrating thing anyone could say to me.  It almost makes me cry.
     I am definitely not ready to get married.  I am nowhere near mature enough to handle that kind of relationship well.  Also, I have never lived apart from my parents, and while that does not hinder most people, for me it means I have no idea how to take care of a house.  My parents are such a blessing, but there are some things that I can try to do myself that they step in to do instead.  I have never done certain things, even though I have tried, because they have stepped in to finish them for me.  And until I can take care of myself, I am not ready to take care of a husband also.
     God is definitely calling me to stay single for now.  Honestly, I do not believe He will call me into marriage any time soon.  I would love to get married, more than I can say.  Because of that, as long as I am supposed to be single, comments on future marriage are far more frustrating than I can say.
     Several of you reading this have probably seen me laugh off a comment on marriage, or even joke with it.  I have been told that I am very good at pasting a front over my feelings.  So if this surprises you, okay.  Just please, next time you are tempted to make one of those comments...don't.  I will let you know when that changes.